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The excerpt represents the core issue or deciding factor on which you must meditate, and is drawn from Riders of the Purple Sage by Zane Grey: as he saw her, received a pang.
"Yes--the truth. Bess, don't misunderstand. I haven't changed
that way. I love you still. I'll love you more afterward. Life
will be just as sweet--sweeter to us. We'll be--be married as
soon as ever we can. We'll be happy--but there's a devil in me. A
perverse, jealous devil! Then I've queer fancies. I forgot for a
long time. Now all those fiendish little whispers of doubt and
faith and fear and hope come torturing me again. I've got to kill
them with the truth."
"I'll tell you anything you want to know," she replied, frankly.
"Then by Heaven! we'll have it over and done with!...Bess--did
Riders of the Purple Sage | 
